Pitfalls of the "Me" Plan in the Social Age

Are you on the "me" plan? 

When someone asks "how you are," do you tell them? I mean, really tell them? Or when you ask someone how they are, do you listen for a second or two . . . and then tell them how you are?

Then you probably are on the "me" plan. It's the plan that tells the world that everything, pretty much, is all about you. Now, a healthy sense of self and strong self-confidence are important; we here at Positively Writing acknowledge and endorse that fully. But in excess, they spread a negative image of yourself, and send negative signals to your "friends" and everyone else around you.

Egocentric people make little effort to empathize or understand your feelings. Their feelings are paramount; often they are the only ones that exist. When these people talk, they reveal their focus. They speak of their "accomplishments" or the "cool" things they do, and they exaggerate these things to reinforce their egos, to convince themselves their lives are extraordinarily important.

We're all for independence, independent thinking, standing up for ourselves. Who could argue against those? But extreme self-centerdness has the effect of separating individuals from all those around them. And, trite as it may sound, we really are all in this together.

So we're here to campaign for  a little humility. And a sense of community. And to ask those on the "me" plan to take a breath—take a deep breath—and actually listen to someone. We talk and talk and talk about being "connected" via social networks and blogs and microblogs and online communities and . . . wouldn't it be nice to exchange a warm, real moment with someone?

So to all you digital dudes and doyennes, a humble suggestion: Take the next critical and most telling step in your connectedness: feel what that someone is telling you. Don't just tell them how you feel, truly connect with their feelings and tell them what you understand about them. That could be the first step in getting onto the "we" plan. And very simply, it's just the right thing to do.